My dearest friend
What I realized this week after meeting up with a friend:
I always thought I’m the one whom put in the most effort; always listening patiently to her problems and giving her good advices now and then. I adopted different ways of putting the same old message across so that she can see how she has been running her endless cycle / pattern of conversations that created all her problems.
What I didn’t realize is that she too, have put in alot of effort in the friendship.
As one whom has never done TCC nor POS, she listens patiently to all my breakthroughs. Even though she can never experience the joy I have had nor comprehend fully what I so enthusiatically share, she always try her best to catch up and view things from my world view.
She is happy for my growth and breakthroughs, but misses the days when both of us bitched about our problems, and laughed at our own silly-ness. She acknowledged how much I’ve grown, accepted the new me, but a part of her resented the new me too.
What I really wanted to say to her was:
It’s not that I don’t bitch nowadays. It’s not that I lost my innocence. It’s that I’m waiting for her to grow up so we can start bitching about other stuffs other than those same old problems. And I really wanted to tell her how much I love her, and that she matters to me alot. And she’ll always be my best friend no matter what.
To all my other friends, thank you for accepting me for who I am, including who i will become.
What I would like to say more often to you is:
I love you.
